Lazy vs Stuck

So a lot has happened inbetween my last post and now. There was a national election. (You may have heard something about it, yes?) Thanksgiving. Which had some interesting side dishes, like an issue with my medication. A very important medication that helps me be clear in my natural predisposition to be grateful and settled. Which I found to be incredibly ironic, considering the day.

But I don’t want to talk about that. Honestly, I think it’s half the reason I have had the month long absence from my blog. (That and the usual 2020 shenanigans.) I didn’t want to talk about how hard it is to deal with mental health issues with medication, let alone without.

And I won’t even go into the Catch-22, hellhole I am in, still trying to get that medication refilled. Psychiatrist only allows for phone calls as a form of communication, despite having an entire digital system at his fingertips. I have anxiety about phone calls and it takes everything for me to make them. Medication is for anxiety… And the beat goes on.

I don’t want to talk about it. But maybe I should.

I’m stuck. I’m overwhelmed. I’m perseverating in circles.

I saw the best Dinosaur comic explaining that overwhlemed feeling. Yes, it was a comic with dinosaurs. It was shared in my favorite, most useful facebook group- Tracy Otsuka’s ADHD for Smart Ass Women. A friend invited me after she was diagonosed and it’s been the least divisive, overwhelmingly supportive, most useful group I have ever been apart of. Apparently Tracy has a podcast which I need to jump on as soon as I’m unstuck.

Anway, I grabbed a screen shot:

This perfectly describes my situation I am in right now. And as I commented on facebook, I have never felt so seen by a comic with dinosaurs in it.

Being still pretty stuck… I don’t have much more to say than this…

When you feel like you are overwhelmed because you can’t get anything done, and so it all piles up, and you are distracted again and again….

You’re not lazy.

You’re just stuck.

And while our lives may feel like a tarpit, it’s not. We can become unstuck. We won’t petrify.

I hope.